42. Mondays

42. Mondays

You’re probably thinking this one is pretty generic and “doesn’t everyone hate Mondays?” Well, you may be right, I may be crazy, but no one hates them as much as an investment banking analyst.

The average twenty-three year old not far out of college works a 9-6 job and can enjoy his nights and weekends. The reason Average Joe hates Mondays so much? Because he just had an amazing Friday night – Sunday night of freedom doing things he loves, and now he is back in a cubicle staring at his Dell.

The reason Dbag I. Banker, IV hates his job? Because he just spent all weekend at work despite the fact that his girlfriend was in town visiting for the first time in 6 months, and now he is at work on a Monday knowing there is no real sleep in sight for at least another 4 days.

I had the luxury of watching Office Space the other night for the hundredth time, which is why this entry sprung to mind. Don’t you just wish you could be like Peter in Office Space when Lundberg tells him to “Um, yeaaaaa, I'm gonna need you to come in on Saturday. And yeaaa, Sunday too”? (Watch from the 4:15 mark to like 6:00 in my opinion). Instead of obeying, just sleep in on Saturday and zone out, fish and enjoy spending time with Jennifer Aniston. Sounds like the perfect weekend to me. Peter basically ruined work ethic for people like me because he made me realize that I do so much useless crap that I just don’t enjoy. I may not fill out a TPS report, but there’s plenty of other mindless procedures. In Office Space, Peter is able to just say “F it” to his job and yet get a promotion through his brutal honesty. Maybe I should try that….

Oh, and for those of you who haven’t seen Office Space, what the hell are you doing with your life? One of the funniest movies of the past decade. Quit watching porn, and rent this from Netflix or Blockbuster, ASAP. It won’t make your life any better, but it will definitely make you laugh at your job and say “Oh, I’ve been there.”